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newer-older-profile-gbook-notes- e-mail-dland failure to reject. 06.03.02 at 2:36 pm 0 comments so far today i am a short coffee of the day. it's not that i'm afraid of my future. i think i'm afraid that when i'm "done" with this "step" called college i will be "behind" all my peers. i won't have the same opportunities. i will be the one who didn't "make it." all my "plans" i share with my peers will be disposed when they are offered impassable opportunities; opportunities i am not afforded. yes, it's true. as i said to erica, "it's important what i do with my time, not where i spend my time." but it's hard to remember that. i know that a number and name from a school does not determine my self worth. but it's hard to remember that. but what is more tangible than what i do, and what shows what i have achieved and am capable of achieving more than those numbers and that name? my thoughts are not tangible, the $7.60/hour i make is not what i am worth. so what, then, determines my self worth? maybe it's futile to discuss self worth. after all, it's laden with thoughts of reputation and pride. should life be about "making one's mark"? that seems to be one of many reasons why people choose to have children. or to care enough to strive for economic and therefore social success. maybe our existance as humans does come down to pride. without pride; being proud of one's self�achievements, duties�what more do we have? what else is driving us to continue? as per usual, i am sitting in MATH 240; intro to statistics. statistics; the science of uncertainty. we will never accept, we will merely fail to reject.
forget about your ego, forget about your pride and you will never have to compromise. but you were only joking.
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